Saturday, July 18, 2015


Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
    the fruit of the womb a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior
    are the children[a] of one's youth.
Blessed is the man
    who fills his quiver with them!
He shall not be put to shame
    when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.[b]
Psalm 127:3-5 (ESV)

Today I will take out the car to town, and I will bring it back filled to the brim with groceries. All sorts of wonderful foods that my children like to eat. Clean, healthy foods that taste great. Fresh fruits and vegetables. Bread that I didn't bake. Meat. Pounds of meat: a luxury to most of the world, normal to us. When I come home, I probably won't have to go to the store for another week.

I sat on the deck in the quiet of the morning and thought about this. I thanked God for the blessing of my grocery shopping days. Warm tears began to flow as I thought of my sisters in Christ around the world who have to forage for food to feed their hungry children. Or even those who lack the luxury of safe storage for a weeks' worth of groceries and must shop every day. I remember with shame how just a few minutes before I was complaining over an inconvenience. A spilled cup of milk. And now I cry because I know--I feel--I am so blessed far beyond what I am worthy of. It is not because my Father loves me more. It is not because I am more obedient or love more or am anything better than anyone else.

I wrestled with why and didn't come up with a conclusion, but I did find my thoughts upon a different realization.

My children are a blessing, but the sheer number of children I have are a reflection of blessings upon me. My children reflect that

~we have access to excellent health care
~we are well-fed
~we are clothed
~we have shelter
~we have the choice for me to stay home with them

And I plead today that I will not waste it. It is hard to have ten children. It is crazy. It is sacrificial. But it is a blessing. It is possible only because God has made it possible.

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